hatezorlovez

I hatez
Disney "Stars"

It's just such bullshit. They're cute little girls and all, but they suck at everything they do. They're not good actresses, and NONE of them can sing. But mainly, I hate them because I'm jealous. When I was fifteen, I just wanted to wear really expensive clothes and not go to school. And I wanted to be loaded for the rest of my life. Then, when I hit seventeen, I wanted to get fucked up all the time and dress like a whore. Man, these kids are livin' the life. Is there a God? Why does he hate me? I'll wear glitter and hair extensions. Disney doesn't like people past 17, you say? Fuck you, Disney. Fuck you really hard.

Sour Candy

Fuck. This. You'll probably disagree with me because sour candy probably reminds you of when you were young and stupid and liked the pain this shit causes, but I wasn't a moron like you. I do not like that it squeezes my jaws and hurts, I don't like that it gives you those little bumps in your mouth, and I don't like that it makes my teeth all squeaky and gross. 'Nuff said.

Lastly,
SONIC


can eat a dick.


I LOVEZ:

John motherfucking Mayer

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Now, don't take that as I find him attractive. I don't. I actually think he looks sort of trollish or something. But, I would still have his children. He is sexy. And I don't really say that because it sounds pretty gay, but it's true in his case. Also, he's smart, funny, and he's like, insightful and caring and deep. Or at least that's how I paint him in my mind? I have yet to experience John Mayer live, because one of two things would happen: I would either literally secrete my pants off and/or get arrested for sexual molestation. Not many people have this effect on me, so I'll admit the shit when it happens.

Kittens

What is there to say really? I luz them. They cute. And because of lolCats, when I see them I only want to speak in internet lingo, and that's just funny.